What Women Really Want In A Man

         

         Time and time again people have asked me what I really want in a man. Men have over the ages claimed that they do not know what we really want. There comes a time in a woman's life when she ceases to look for the physical attributes of a man and searches deeper into his soul. Women crave a man who can look beyond their physique, beyond the curves and see the beauty that lies inside. Every man should learn that for women, it is not always about sex, that sometimes we just like to be held and assured that everything will be al-right without any sinister motives. Women crave attention. Women want men who will let their guards down, swallow their egos and show them how much they are loved, tell them how beautiful they look. This is where the true test comes in. True beauty has nothing to do with sexual appeal, true compliments should not always be about the physical. We crave deep friendship and a soul to confide in. We crave men who gaze deep into our eyes and tell us that we are incredible. Focus on building up our trust, little by little.

          Whenever we are angry or sad, simply be there for us. Be a constant presence that does not implode, that does not bother. Rather listen to our deepest feelings and fears. Women long for a man who can be there for them at their worst, love them even while they are wearing a torn shirt, glow in their beauty when they have just woken up and there is zero make-up on their skin. When there is some toxic silence hovering over us, that is when we need you the most. It is not often when we are clearly angry and screaming that we are hurting the most. Our silence speaks well more than a double edged spear. Our thoughts can travel to the ends of the world when we are silent. We could say that we are okay, but we are never really fine when we are silent. Learn to know the difference. Simply hold her when that silent cloud hangs over her. When she tries to walk away angry, give her a hug and let her know how much she means to you. It may never seem manly to tell her how good she makes you feel in front of your friends, but it does go a long way. Do not expect to be treated like a king if you won't treat her like a queen.

          The only thing a woman ever really asks for before she says “I do” is the security that her man will always be by her side, that his love will shelter her from the storms of life, and that it will last a lifetime. That is security, that is what most of us long for, unless men have been looking in the wrong direction. We flourish in the presence of inspirational men; men who support us and inspire us to be our best in our careers, once again putting their own egos and issues aside. Men who look up at us and say, “Wow, I am proud of her.” Men who tell their women, “Go ahead honey, let your fire become my flame.” Sometimes it pays to let the woman shine, to let her be the centre of your world, to be prepared to defend her from the pressures and poking eyes of life. It is good to be appreciative of the effort she makes. None of us is perfect. Love her beyond her flaws. Hold her close no matter the imperfections. Be ambitious enough to give her something in you to be proud about. Dream beyond this world, do not just sit at the same spot year in year out and expect her to still have stars in her eyes for you.

          I have simply always searched for that deep love that transcends the physical. I have always longed to be placed at the centre of someone’s universe, to be held close no matter my flaws. To be reminded that I am special, honoured and cherished. I have always longed to be assured that somewhere in this world, someone is praying for my happiness, that I contribute to the smile across someone's face, and that without me in their world, their days would be dark and cold. Simply put, I want a man who can look deep into my soul and see the possibilities that lie within. I want a man who will reach for the good in me, smooth away the flaws, and bless me with true love. Isn't that all every good natured, mature woman ever asks for?

Written by Maureen Songa

Go to the Magazine Website: www.spinklymagazine.com

A GIRL'S GUIDE TO WEARING LEGGINGS

Leggings, Jeggings, and Jeans, Oh My!

What’s really the difference between a legging, a jegging, and jeans? Well, leggings are of a thicker material than stockings, that is, they are not transparent, but they are definitely not pants! I just don’t think leggings should be worn with your booty hanging out. A long top should be worn over the leggings, because once again, they are not pants. Leggings come in a wide variety of colors and prints, as do stockings. Jeans and jeggings are usually black, blue, gray, and of different washes.

Jeggings are stretchy and fitted like leggings, yet they are not as thick or made of the same material as denim. They are called jeggings because they are a cross between leggings and jeans. They resemble a skinny jean but in a more stretchy and comfortable material. Jeggings typically don’t have zippers and pockets either. But some do. I have a pair of jeggings that resemble jeans so closely, but they have no zipper. They do have a button, however. But, typically, jeggings are meant to be pulled up over your legs and butt, and voila! They are on. Jeans require zippers, snaps or buttons to close. Jeans are definitely considered pants so long tops are not required, although permitted of course.

Hopefully this has cleared it up for you. What will they come out with next?

We tell you the best (and worst) ways to wear leggings

Love 'em or hate 'em, leggings are here to stay (at least for another season) and, like sunglasses, sandals and sun dresses, they've managed to find their way into every girl's summer wardrobe. I personally love leggings. When done right, they can look hip, fashionable and effortless. Done wrong, they are the epitome of tacky, shabby and, at times, vulgar.

Now that spring is here, and the promise of warmer days just a weather report away, leggings are out in full force, and maybe it's the influence of celebs like Lindsey Lohan (consider your role models, ladies!), but I can't help but notice all the seemingly sensible women stepping out of doors wearing leggings in lieu of pants. The number of sightings is truly disturbing and with the leggings season just gearing up, we thought it our duty to remind wayward fashionistas how to wear them and, most importantly, how not to wear them.

Leggings are ...

Let's get one thing straight: leggings are footless tights, which, like fishnets, thigh-highs and Spanx, are another category of hosiery. Hosiery is an undergarment. Self-explanatory, no? Now having arrived at this critical juncture, I will concede to a few instances in which wearing tights as pants is acceptable, namely if you are a dancer, under the age of 12 or wearing a Halloween costume.

Leggings are not pants

Pants have a hard enough time competing with skirts and dresses in the summer months that it hardly seems fair that they're now being placed on the back burner for, well, nothing at all. Some suspect the leggings-as-pants craze is an extension of the skinny jeans trend, but I see it more as an extension of the yoga-pants-as-regular-pants trend that Lululemon unwittingly (or maybe wittingly?) unleashed a few years back. Leggings are the new yoga pants and, in my opinion, wearing them in lieu of actual pants is (like wearing workout clothes outside the gym) classic lazy dressing with a dash of indecency thrown in for good measure.

This doesn't mean leggings should be worn only under a dress, skirt or tunic. It just means you must follow one simple rule: wear tops that go past the buttocks. Think tasteful mini-skirt as a cut-off. The point is to avoid the potential for overexposure. No one is interested in seeing your hip bones, VPL or, heaven forbid, camel toe and believe me, we can see it all. Try leggings paired with a long, flowery top, an oversized button-down or long, punk-inspired t-shirt (think Agyness Deyn).

Leggings are not cropped pants

Now that we know how to wear our leggings up top, let's speak briefly about the bottom. There's no getting around it, leggings that cut you off mid-calf are totally unflattering, not to mention horrendously tacky. Wear them high enough to show off your amazing shoes, but anything above mid-calf will make you look short and stumpy, and who wants that? Elongate your legs by elongating your leggings.

Leggings are not jeans

Jeans have an incredible ability to look great when they've been distressed and have fraying holes and tears in them. Not really true of leggings. This may seem like common sense but you'd be surprised at how many women wear them until they're pilling like a Patagonia pullover and falling apart at the seams. If your leggings are sheer but weren't meant to be, it's time to shell out the $10 to $30 for a new pair. Especially if you're going to be wearing them as pants ... which you won't.

Next time you get your leggings remember they are not pants and should be worn with a decent top. 

Written by Dorothy Moraa Osoro

Go to the Magazine Website: www.spinklymagazine.com

Great Love Involves Taking Risks

When we hear the term "love conquers all" it tends to become unrealistic. I'm still wondering if the term is actually true but all in all it helps when applied well. Shakespeare once stated "Love is not love when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove, O, no! It is an ever fixed mark, that looks in tempests and never shaken." There is way too much benefit that comes along with love, and with it still carries hardships which require a lot of patience and forgiveness.

No matter how much you love someone they are bound to make mistakes. Sometimes we are left with the choice of either being patient and accepting the shortcomings or just walking away. A few of the steps listed will help when a relationship hits a rock:

It is important to remind us the things it has overcome. Sometimes just looking at the things you have overcome in a relationship makes us realize how far a relationship has come and how far the relationship can go and that giving up is not the best option.

Simply acknowledge the whole package as it is. If you cannot take him as he is and his shortcomings be sure things become tougher. They are bound to make mistakes and sometimes you may find yourself asking if he loves me then why is he doing this? It's a matter of learning to understand that the person you love is fallible despite the pedestal that love plays with them.

Learning the art of forgiveness. Forgiving is simply an art that we have to teach ourselves constantly. If you truly love someone you cannot habour a grudge against them, It is important to practice this art or just walk away.

Remembering that you love that person helps. When you love someone it's easier to forgive them. This is where the term 'love conquers all' comes in. Remembering that you love that person helps forget their mistakes and the hurt feelings they gave you.

Involve God. Love is an act of faith and choosing to involve God helps. It helps overcome the very fears which come from hurt feelings. Resolving the fear helps dispel the negative feelings.

Sometimes we also have to realize that life has no do-overs, it has to go on. This only means that we constantly have to make choices in relationships especially when they aren't going well and the same choices will affect us in one way or another. A quote master once stated knowing how to solve an issuer in not all about knowing how to do it or how to get by it is all insufficient without courage, love, compassion and empathy.

Written by Esther Gathambo  

Go to the Magazine Website: www.spinklymagazine.com

Baked Egg Bread Bowl

I like food that looks interesting. More so if it’s a simple recipe which I can put together. Having a great love for bread bowls made me fall in love with this dish, and it’s fairly easy to put together in a large roll. It’s also a great dish to introduce to young children, who won’t resist the presentation! Feel free to use whatever vegetables you have at hand, or even add some meat.

I love Baby Bella mushrooms so it’s what I used. Mushrooms provide potassium, riboflavin, niacin, Selenium, Pantothenic Acid, copper, some vitamin B and Vitamin D.

This bread bowl makes a perfect brunch since it has egg and vegetables. To make more than one, simply multiply the ingredients.

Ingredients

1 large roll for each egg

1 egg

3 oz. sliced mushrooms

1 clove garlic

1 cup fresh baby spinach

1 tsp. olive oil

1 Tbsp. cream

1 Tbsp.  Cheese, grated

Freshly ground black pepper to taste

Method

 Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Slice the top off of the roll and hollow out the inside. Set top aside and place roll on a baking sheet. Saute mushrooms, garlic, and spinach in oil until mushrooms are soft. Put the mushroom mixture in the bottom of the roll. Crack the egg over the mushroom mixture. Pour cream over egg. Sprinkle with cheese. Sprinkle with pepper. Bake for 20 minutes. Put tops on baking sheet with rolls and bake another 5 minutes