Tuesday, May 21, 2013


There are a lot of dating advice columnists who will tell us that women should never approach men. They’ll tell you that it’s the man’s job to pursue the woman and when a woman tries to pursue a man, she comes across as desperate or loose.  Add those pieces of advice to the pile of all the other heap of crap men have been saying that doesn’t make much sense and let’s get real.
Have you ever seen a guy so gorgeous that he makes you melt?  A quick dream flashes through your head. You turn away and quietly walk the other way hoping he didn’t catch saliva dripping copiously from your mouth. And you ask yourself “Why couldn’t I just say something to him?” We all go through this at some point in our lives but it doesn’t have to be that way!
Women are told to take initiative, go out and get what they want, and not sit back and wait for a man to do everything, but the one thing we should never do is approach a man? It doesn’t make much sense at all. Being independent and not needing a guy is still the biggest attraction we have as well as our looks but I think it’s good that we get over our insecurities and try it a few times.
Make the first move; Guys love it when a girl is genial and approaches them, partly because then they wouldn’t have to do all the work. It shows him right off the bat that you’re interested and that takes a lot of the pressure off him. So make the first move! If you don't know how to make the first move then try to take interest in what he does such as if he likes basketball or maybe you could ask him about things he likes and talk to him, take interest in him and most likely he will take interest in you.

Be confident; If you appear confident to your guy, he will think you are confident; it’s that easy. Walk up to him like you own the ground you walk on. It will impress him knowing that you’re comfortable in your skin. Do a lively, cheerful, and self-confident walk, flip a wisp of hair out of your face and say hello to him. Be careful not to look like you have this; I-am-better-than-you-bow-down-at-my-feet arrogance.

Compliment him; What guy does not like being complimented? You could tell him he has great hair or how good he looks in the shirt he’s wearing. This may seem cliché, but for a guy, what’s going through his head is “Wow. Hot girl. Likes my hair. Thank you God for giving me this hair!” Be ready for possible reactions though-  a) he'll find it offensive, b) ignore you, c) get a little angry or d) faintly smile, slightly raise his shoulders and he may look away- this means he definitely likes you :).

Give him the look; “The Look” is a certain look that you have that says, “I want you to notice me.” This is your sexiest, most mysterious look that will only last a few seconds so as to leave him breathless and wanting more. A little warning though don't turn into a creepy stalker girl case and end up behind bars. So for everyone’s wellbeing, a few seconds will do!

Be alone when you approach your boy; When you approach your guy, it’s not with a clique of your friends behind you, this more often than not, will scare him away. Your guy will feel more at ease if it’s just one on one. This will also give you guys a chance to get to know each other without having any interruptions.

The effort; When you’re attempting to feed someone a piece of cake you have to let them know that you want them to have it, but you must require that they do the effort of coming to get it. Envision yourself as the cake, put yourself in a position in which he begins to crave you, but hold back just enough to make him do the work needed to have you.
Have a support group; Having a support group to help you deal with rejection is essential. You’re not going to succeed every time you approach a man. It takes a lot of attempts to find one that works. I think we tend to try something once, experience failure and then completely write it off as a bad idea going forward.  You’ll try and fail, try and fail; try and win a little, eventually fail, you'll have the support group to hold you down.
I hope you feel more empowered to approach men. Now go on Beautiful! Get over that fear of rejection, bite the bullet and just do it. Spark that conversation!

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