One
of my passions in life will always be women. I will always crave to impact and
change the life of a little girl, to teach them how to dream and reach beyond
the stars. In my heart of hearts I always believe that my soul shall soar
beyond the heavens, singing a happy rhythm, if only I can touch the hearts of
at least eight young girls, if I can only inspire them to visualize the
realities that await beyond village life, and suffering, and poverty. Call me
sexist, but this is for all the women, the epitome of strength and wisdom,
those who at one point in time, have rubbed their shoulders with mine, and left
an enduring sense of inspiration.
• You are
woman. You are priceless. You possess strength within every fiber of your
being. You are stronger than you think you are. When you are filled with doubt
and your energy seems to fail you, just remember that you are woman, the very
core of strength. Do not ever let anybody tell you that you cannot achieve.
Reach for your goals. Work hard for them. Do not rely on anybody's pity. Some
say we are the weaker sex, but what they do not realize is that there is a lot
of strength in weakness.
• No man
under the skies is worth pulling another woman's hair over. You do not need to
hurl insults at another woman simply because you are fighting over a man. I
believe us ladies are capable of stopping the scourge of the other woman. At no
point in time, will a married man ever really leave his family for a sexy younger
lady, not wholly anyway. I see women going on about how they still allow the
married men to take care of their families and I silently wonder what happened
to the strong women I so admired. No woman, no child should ever have to
scramble for the attention of their father. No legitimate family should ever
have to go without food simply because the man of that house decided to go buy
Kentucky Fried Chicken for some other woman.
• Sometimes
love will hurt. Most times men will trample your heart. Buckets of tears will flow
from your eyes. But eventually there will come a day when you will wake up and forget
that you ever hurt that bad. In the end you will learn to move on to greater
things. The ache will get easier with time. Greater men will come along, and
you will wonder what you ever saw in your ex. The only thing that you will
require is the will to love yourself enough to let go. Never ever stay in an
abusive environment, for abuse will never be an event that occurs once and can
be hidden away by the gift giving process. I long ago learnt, that domestic
violence is a process, a chain of events that sways into a relationship slowly,
something that begins with only a single slap, and the more you forgive, the
deeper it becomes engraved in the heart of the relationship. Love yourself well
enough to let go. Never be afraid to start over again. Do not ever be too
scared of lonely to leave when you are hurting.
• Education
is the husband that will never cheat on you, beat you up or leave you for a hot
younger woman. Enough said.
• You are
beautiful. You were born a queen. Look at the beauty that comes from inside. Do
not let yourselves be defined by societal standards and demands. Make sure you
feel comfortable in your own skin. Dress your age. Dress to feel gorgeous. Put
on something sexy on the inside that only you know about. Be confident. Do not
be ashamed of putting on a beautiful weave when you are the one who bought it.
• The grace
of God is most sufficient when you feel like you have hit rock bottom, when you
are too ashamed to utter a word of prayer, when you just want to hide from the
world. You do not need to pray out loud, you do not need a page full of words,
all you need is a whisper, a tear. He will understand. Sometimes I wish I could
listen to this advice.
• Sometimes
in this life you will find yourself doing shameful things, things scornful to
the society. You might find yourself captured by sinful bonds. You might find
yourself dating men you are ashamed to walk with in daylight. You might find
your plate full of regrets. Always remember that when you finally find your
bearing, all you need to do is to forgive yourself. Forgive YOURSELF. That is
all that matters. Everything else is black and white, sinking sand.
• Do not
let your childhood background define the heights your success can reach. You
can change all that. Dreams do come true, even those that are dreamt while
learning under a tree. You can be the best that God intended you to be. Humble
beginnings can only provide you the bearing you require to unleash the most
phenomenal part of your being. It does not matter how your past has been. It
does not matter whether you were the kind of child who climbed a guava tree for
lunch simply because you had no food at home. You could be the one whose mother
had to toil, breaking her back, even having to sell local brew simply to put
you through school. However, that could change, it only requires the will, the
desire and the spirit to analyze your aspirations beyond what the naked eye can
recognize.
• If you
are blessed with girlfriends who truly care about you, hold them tight, cherish
them. Such are scarce. Do not ever make the mistake of throwing them to the
gutter simply because you got married, or you got children, or you pursued a
different career. Women need each other. We need each other's hugs. Be happy
for the achievements of your girlfriends. Support them in their pursuits. You
too will be blessed.
My dear daughters, I have lived in the
presence of some of the most inspiring women of all. They taught me to walk
this world with dignity. Head held up high. They taught me that wearing
trousers is not a pre-requisite for being a mathematician, or an engineer, or a
doctor. They showed me the sacrifices they would endure just to see me smile.
They showed me the path to a brighter future, they lit my candle. I too, can
only hope to pass over the mantle. For the love I feel inside, the passion that
feels me each time I think of all the knowledge I can pass on to you, runs
deeper than any still waters. By all means walk tall, be independent enough to
stand on your own two feet. For those long luscious legs, that lovely smile,
could only have been born of a priceless queen.
Written by Maureen Songa
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